I Tried The Beautifying App Kim Kardashian Is A Fan Of

Online beauty tip: Duck Face + Correct Angle + Good Lighting + Smoulder + Charming Self-Depreciating Caption = Gloried Selfie

Despite being a dinosaur with an IPhone, I have taken a few selfies in my time. I quite like the outfit selfie, especially when I’m wearing an Acne shearling biker, and Saint Laurent leather ankle boots. C’mon world, I want you know my entire mirror contents. As young people reveal themselves on the Internet the older generation snoop with alarm. Has creating the perfect selfie gone a stretch too far?

A simple Valencia filter has proved unworthy as face editing apps can smooth your skin, contour your face, zap a spot, make your boobs bigger, make you taller, change your eye colour, make you look like an entirely different human, or not human at all. This isn’t so much a filter rather the creation of a deluded reality. It seems we have become our own retouchers and best of all no creative flair is required. Even John Mayer is a fan of photo-editing his pictures. Mayer posted an image with his buddy on Instagram with the caption, "So good to see my friend Ricky again. It has been a while". It may have been a while, but he's gone all Benjamin Button on us.

Is using a photo-editing app hitting social rock bottom? It appears not, because nobody is worried about us crafting virtual realities. With apps like Perfect365 and Facetune, it turns out the correct angle and a flattering light source proves irrelevant. It doesn’t matter where you are, who you are, when such apps offer a cheaper alternative to plastic surgery. I mean what is the point of a selfie? For me it is an intimate act. A private selfie can be a good self-esteem fix when your jaw-line doesn’t look as sharp as it once was. You can share a seductive selfie with a flame. One of the best pieces of advice I have ever been given is, “You’re not good at speaking to men, but you have a strong face so let the visuals speak”, charming. Do selfies have any real value with such photo editing apps representing everything to the world as fiction? Were Selfies not already pathological, self-loving, narcissistic, and self-promoting? Now a filter is applied, flaws are blurred, and it’s a high school popularity contest in the digital age. Are we simply self-objectifying for self-affirmation? It’s evolution, it’s genetics, and we are only human. But I remain the optimist we have evolved further to learn sometimes you can’t fix everything, flaws and all.

Perfect 365/Beauty Photo Box are two of the most downloaded apps to make you look prettier, Perfect 365 is loved by the Kardashians who are synonymous with selfies. (Kim Kardashian's Selfish book is so different to anything anyone else has ever published). With Perfect 365 you can reverse the clocks, and have fun with dramatic/terrifying makeup styles.

Online beauty tip: With Perfect 365, be weary with softness levels, if you have no ear lobes take the softness level down. Then post your selfie on Instagram with #wokeuplikedis.

Online beauty buy: If you want to look like you have a filter in real life try Charlotte Tilbury Film Star Bronze & Glow £49, to sculpt your jaw, and trim your nose.

The first step to using Perfect365 if using the key points to map out your face. You then have the option blur away imperfections, add eye shadow, a flick of eyeliner, a swipe of lipstick, try a different hairstyle, the opportunities are endless. I seem to look like a cloud because my fingers are too sausage-like for precision. I decided to go for the "natural" airbrush look. #IWokeUpLikeThis

Online beauty tip: If you want to look like a beautiful human you need to add an animal to your selfie. When my makeup is on point I grab a animal for my selfie. I then post with a caption like, "This is my cat on my lap. I love cats. Please look at my cat and not at my face because I look so ugly right now".

Online beauty buy: Make sure eyebrows are on fleek with Bobbi Brown Natural Brow Shaper £16.50. Eyebrow shaping is incredibly important if you want people to take you seriously.

Making my eyes larger and changing the colour to red was highly enjoyable. Can we talk about politics, climate change, and foreign affairs now?

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